It’s so easy to make assumptions about how someone is feeling. In an attempt to teach my children emotional intelligence and tap into their feels, I would ask them, “are you sad?” or “are you frustrated?” rather than asking them, without agenda, how they were feeling. Maybe they wouldn’t have had the words, but maybe they would have.
Life is busy and there isn’t always time to drop into how I am feeling, especially in the tender moments. So I often assume how I feel. And only allow myself one side of the big feels. But the reality is, the light exists with the dark, and I am able to see the dark because of the light, and allow the light to illuminate the dark.
Raw and real, here’s the current cocktail of feels…
How am I feeling right now?
Tired.
My bones hurt.
My eye sockets ache and my head is pulsing from my own cries.
My heart has taken a beating.
How am I feeling right now?
Grateful.
For hearts that can yield,
and minds that can bend,
and humans who are willing to transcend fear
and beliefs
and ideas
and society’s construct of rights and wrongs.
How am I feeling right now?
Beautiful. Whole. Capable.
Despite the suffocating pain and the seemingly endless struggle.
Or perhaps…
because of the pain and the struggle.
How am I feeling right now?
Disappointed. That my bold choice to stand in truth
and Love
and integrity
and authenticity
Is met with opinions, and fiercely held stories, and misunderstandings.
How am I feeling right now?
Humbled. To be chosen for this life,
For this moment,
For this experience.
For this Love.
How am I feeling right now?
Alive. So fucking alive.
Experiencing a new depth of raw emotion, staying with it,
crying honest tears of hope and despair,
checking in moment by moment with my heart, mind, body, and soul.
Through all my feelings, and cries and blurred lines, I sit here in awe
that this life is here for me.
The light and the dark.
The bliss and the heartache.
I have everything I need in this moment to grow.
How are you feeling right now?
Rooting and Rising 